


Pass The Butter

by LetMeBeBrave



Series: Maximoff Shenanigans [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Darcy cant speak Sokovian, Everyone Is Alive, F/M, Pietro thinks he's smooth, Pietro's a little shit, Wanda is also a little shit sometimes, everyone is happy, like usual, post Age of Ultron
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-07
Updated: 2015-12-07
Packaged: 2018-05-05 12:37:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,056
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5375453
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LetMeBeBrave/pseuds/LetMeBeBrave
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This Is Why She Owned Earmuffs. </p>
<p>And Of course, what had she forgotten to bring to Barton's farm home? Earmuffs. <br/>“I could not Possibly need them,” Wanda had thought to herself whilst packing for their Weekend away. <br/>But that was before she learned that her Brother was bringing his...Friend along with them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pass The Butter

This Is Why She Owned Earmuffs. 

And Of course, what had she forgotten to bring to Barton's farm home? Earmuffs.   
“I could not Possibly need them,” Wanda had thought to herself whilst packing for their Weekend away.   
But that was before she learned that her Brother was bringing his...Friend along with them.   
She was under the impression that it was just going to be her and Pietro, until Darcy Lewis climbed into the seat behind Wanda, who felt a mixture of delight and confusion.   
She had no problem with the Woman.   
She actually liked her quite a bit.   
Yes, she was very loud.   
And yes, she had little to no filter.   
But she had her charms.   
And her brother Absolutely saw those charms. Even if he wouldn't admit Out Loud.   
He was not the Stealthiest person you'll ever meet.   
Or the quietest.   
And he tended to forget that she could easily slip into his mind. 

~~

Wanda had spent the Car Ride to the Farm in silence, as she attempted to block out her brother's thoughts, Shooting him irritated glances every now and then.   
And he simply offered a cheeky grin, his arm wrapped around the waist of his Companion. 

 

They had spent a pleasant evening with Clint's family.   
Wanda read books to his children, using her abilities to pick up their toys and act out the stories using them.   
Pietro had spent most of his time zipping around the house with Clint's youngest on his shoulders, yelling “NYOOM”

 

Pietro and Darcy had retired rather early, claiming that the “Car ride had tired them out”, and Wanda had decided to stay up for a while with Clint. Laura had also gone to bed early. ...Well, they Made her go to bed, seeing as she had done a majority of the cooking and cleaning that night.   
They drank coffee and swapped a few stories, and generally had a good time.   
Wanda had shared some rather Embarrassing stories from Pietro's youth, which made Clint laugh harder than she had ever seen before.

She had curled up after a while, snuggled up with a pillow as she levitated a small flower, slowly turning it over in the air.   
She was letting her mind wander throughout the hallways, listening to the soft breathing of her sleeping housemates...When she stumbled across something that made her drop the flower due to shock.   
Labored breathing and Very happy whimpers.   
Smug, muffled laughter from an obviously smirking figure.   
Wanda had Unfortunately stumbled across her Brother's room. 

Her face Must have been humorous, judging by the look Clint was giving her.   
Horrified could not even Begin to describe how she felt.   
She was about to tear herself away and go hit her head against a wall, When she heard Darcy utter Five words. 

“Speak Sokovian Between My Legs.” Darcy had managed to get out.

Wanda froze, lips pursed as she tried to stifle laughter.   
So she waited.   
Waited for her Dear Brother's reply.   
It was going to be good, she could tell. Given by the long pause. 

“...прође путер.” Pietro said, in the most Seductive voice he could manage.   
Darcy let out a rather Large moan at that, which was when Wanda completely lost it. 

 

She fell off the couch, almost hitting her head on the coffee table as tumbled, curling up when she hit the ground, Howling with laughter. 

“The HELL, Glinda The Good Witch?!” Clint yelped, staring at her, rather concerned.   
(Clint wasn't often one for Nicknames, save the occasional “Dorito” when addressing Steve, but he had grown fond of the “Code Name” Stark had thought up for Wanda.)

Wanda was Wheezing. Tears were falling down her face. Her chest hurt, and she sounded like seal. 

Clint had seen her laugh, sure. Normally a throaty chuckle or a loud laugh during an inappropriate situation, which she often tried to pass off as a cough. It was great to see her laugh. But she had normally stopped by now. This just kept. Going. 

“...Waannddaaa...??” He asked, eyebrows worriedly knit together as he watched her. 

“P...Pass the Butter!!” She squealed, smacking the floor as she let out another howl. She was snorting now, and squeaking. 

Clint had never been more confused.   
Had he made a joke earlier? One That she hadn't gotten until now? He didn't know. And he decided it might be better that way. 

 

~~~~~

 

The rest of the Avengers came to the Farm for dinner the next day.   
There had been many comments from Tony on the way there, about “Going to visit the Aviary”, Which earned him several glares from Steve, and snickers from Natasha. 

They all sat wherever there were chairs. The kitchen table only sat 7, and Clint had insisted that his family (Including Wanda and Pietro, seeing as he had pretty much adopted them) sit there.   
So the rest of the team ate in the living room, all having separate conversations. Bruce and Tony were talking about how to repair Veronica, whilst Nat was sitting on the couch, holding little Nathaniel on her lap, holding his arms and putting him in different fighting positions while he giggled his little head off. Steve and Darcy had struck up quite a strong friendship, which shocked Everyone, to be honest.

There was a calm atmosphere in the house, and Wanda reveled in it.   
Her mind skipped around the room, monitoring everyone's mood.   
She had spent Too much time around Anger and Fear in her life, it was a Welcomed change to have everyone be happy.   
She then, upon slipping into Darcy's mind and getting a glimpse of her memories from her and Pietro's Activities, got a Devious idea. She smirked at her brother, who was sitting across the table from her, and set her utensils down, mustering the most Innocent tone of voice she could.   
“Pietro? Could you прође путер, Please?” 

His Eyes widened, he spat his wine out, and his face turned the color of a fire engine.   
Wanda then Completely lost her composure, falling off her chair, squeaking with laughter. 

“...WAIT A SECOND” Darcy yelped from the living room.

“...Guess yah didn't see That coming, Speedy.” Laura said with a smirk as she took a bite of her Salad. 

And with that, the house Erupted into cheers.   
(Whilst Pietro, red faced and flustered still, hid under the table.)


End file.
